Nobody's Girl Read online

  Now, as they closed the café on Saturday and she went upstairs, Pearl swallowed deeply, trying to pluck up the courage to speak to her mother-in-law about her wages.

  She made them all a drink, wondering if she should wait until Kevin came home to offer his support. Yet surely it was just an oversight, Dolly forgetting to pay her along with the others. As she handed her mother-in-law a cup of tea, it rattled in the saucer.

  ‘Er … Dolly, I think you’ve forgotten my wages.’

  ‘Wages! Leave it out, girl. You’re married to my son and whether I like it or not, you’re part of this family now.’

  ‘But—’

  Dolly held up her hand, forestalling any argument. ‘And, may I add, I don’t take a penny for your keep. Pay indeed.’

  ‘But I need to buy—’

  ‘I can’t see that you need anything,’ Dolly interrupted. ‘You live rent free, and all your meals are provided. I hope you don’t think I’m providing money for you to waste on fripperies.’

  ‘No, of course not, but my skirts won’t fasten around my waist and I need a couple of maternity smocks.’

  ‘Well, that’s soon sorted. Gertie’s good with a needle and she’ll be able to add a bit to your skirts. She’ll run you up a couple of maternity smocks too.’ Dolly rose to her feet. ‘I’ve got a length of material somewhere and I’ll dig it out.’

  Pearl watched her leave, her heart sinking. It wasn’t just smocks she needed, there was underwear too. Bernie looked up from his newspaper, eyes sympathetic, and his voice barely above a whisper. ‘I ain’t got much, love, but I can give you five bob.’

  ‘Oh, Bernie,’ Pearl whispered gratefully, only to turn sharply as Dolly returned.

  ‘There,’ she said, holding up a piece of cream material, garishly patterned with bright pink chrysanthemums. ‘It’s been stuck in the cupboard for years, but I knew it would come in handy one day. I reckon there’s enough here for at least two smocks.’

  ‘Blimey, it looks like curtaining,’ Bernie said.

  ‘What does that matter? She’ll only be wearing smocks for a few months and there’s no sense in wasting money.’

  ‘Well, if you say so,’ Bernie said doubtfully, ‘but I don’t know what people are going to think if they see Pearl dressed in that. They’ll think we can’t afford anything better.’

  Dolly frowned. ‘Yeah, you may be right. I’ll put this back in the cupboard and buy a new bit of material.’

  Pearl could have hugged him. He’d obviously hit on the one thing that could make her mother-in-law change her mind: people’s opinions.

  As Dolly marched out of the room again, Bernie winked. ‘You have to know how to handle her,’ he whispered.

  ‘Thanks,’ Pearl mouthed, grateful that he was an ally in this strange household.

  When Dolly returned, Bernie retreated into his newspaper again, and with a sigh Pearl found her fingers itching to paint, to bury her worries in art. Her supplies had run out, not only of paint, but sketching paper too, and with no money of her own, she’d be unable to buy any more. Art classes were a thing of the past now, her dream for the time being ending with her pregnancy. She missed the lessons, wishing she could still afford them, dreading the thought of another evening stuck indoors with her in-laws.

  Kevin walked in at six o’clock, and for a moment Pearl brightened. It was Saturday night – perhaps he’d take her out. But her hopes were dashed when he spoke.

  ‘I’ve got to go out again. Have you ironed my white shirt, Pearl?’

  ‘Out again?’ Bernie said, and, as though sensing how she felt, he added, ‘Are you taking Pearl with you?’

  ‘No. I’ve got a bit of business to sort out.’

  ‘What – on a Saturday night?’ Bernie asked, eyes narrowed as he gazed at his son.

  ‘That’s what I said, didn’t I? Where’s Mum?’

  ‘She’s having a bath.’

  ‘Sod it. I need to talk to her. How long has she been in there?’

  ‘A while. What do you want to talk to her about?’

  ‘That’s my business.’

  ‘No doubt you’re after money again. It’s about time you found yourself a job.’

  ‘I’m doing my best.’

  Bernie shook his head in disgust. ‘You’re a married man now and should think about your wife and coming child.’

  ‘He is looking, Bernie, really he is.’

  ‘Oh yeah? Well, work ain’t that hard to find.’

  As Dolly walked into the room wrapped in a copious blue candlewick dressing gown, her eyes narrowed. ‘Bernie, did I hear you having a go at Kevin?’

  ‘I was just saying that he should get a job.’

  ‘Keep your nose out of it, Bernie. I think I know what’s best for my son and I don’t want him working in some dead-end job without prospects. He has good qualifications and deserves a decent salary, not the pittances he’s been offered so far.’

  ‘Oh, so he’s applied for some jobs then?’

  ‘Of course he has,’ Dolly snapped. ‘Ain’t that right, Kevin?’

  Kevin blinked rapidly, his eyes avoiding his father’s. ‘Yes, but Mum, can I have a word with you in private?’

  ‘Of course,’ she said, beckoning him to her bedroom.

  Kevin followed, but not before turning to Pearl. ‘If you haven’t ironed my white shirt, do it now.’

  Pearl didn’t move. Dolly had given her a stack of ironing yesterday, and she had done the lot, including Kevin’s shirt.

  Bernie said quietly, ‘She’ll give him money. She always does. I know what Dolly’s game is. She doesn’t want to lose her precious son, but she knows that if Kevin finds work the two of you will find a place of your own. Believe me, that’s the last thing my wife wants and she’ll do anything to keep him here.’

  ‘But Kevin wants to leave as much as I do.’

  ‘If you say so, love, but Dolly’s crafty. She knows that as long as she provides Kevin with enough pocket money to keep him happy, the lazy bugger won’t look for work.’

  ‘But he is looking, he told me.’

  ‘Huh, and pigs might fly. I don’t believe him and neither should you.’

  Pearl shook her head, sure that Bernie was wrong. ‘Do you think Kevin will speak to Dolly about my wages? I still need to buy a few things.’

  ‘Leave it out, love. You’ve only been here a short while but you’ve seen how things stand. Kevin won’t speak up for you, but maybe if you ask him, he’ll drop you a few bob out of the money he gets out of his mother.’

  ‘Oh, yes, I’ll do that,’ Pearl said, brightening now.

  When Kevin returned he went to their bedroom and Pearl followed. ‘Kevin, your mother isn’t paying me any wages now and I need some money.’

  ‘Well, don’t look at me.’

  ‘But I need some new underwear and—’

  Kevin paused in the act of throwing on his shirt, his eyes hard. ‘If you want money, you’ll have to sort it out with my mother. Now bugger off and leave me in peace.’

  Pearl stared at him, her heart sinking. Since their marriage he had changed, his moods mostly foul. Nowadays, as she did with Dolly, Pearl to tiptoed around him. She longed for his love, to be held in his arms, but he seemed so hard, so cold. Oh, please let him get a job soon. Please let us find a place of our own. Once away from his mother, Pearl was sure that she and Kevin would be fine.

  Dolly’s temper didn’t improve, and a few days later another waitress walked out, leaving Madge to work the tables on her own.

  Madge came through to the kitchen, puffing loudly to make her feelings plain. ‘Why doesn’t Kevin help out a bit? If he did the counter, Bernie could give me a hand with the tables.’

  ‘He’s busy,’ Dolly snapped.

  ‘Doing what?’

  ‘Madge,’ Dolly said, her voice deceptively quiet, ‘what my son does is no concern of yours. I said he’s busy and that’s an end to it. Until we find another waitress, I’ll pay you a bit extra, but now I suggest you get bac
k to work.’

  ‘All right, but I ain’t standing much more of this. In fact, I think I’ll start looking around for another job.’

  Pearl held her breath, waiting for her mother-in-law to explode, but Madge was at the end of her tether and if Dolly wasn’t careful she’d walk out too, leaving them in a terrible fix.

  For a moment the two women faced each other, but then Dolly heaved a great sigh. ‘All right, Madge, if you want to get another job I can’t stop you. However, if you stay I’ll increase your wages permanently.’

  Madge blinked rapidly, obviously as surprised as Pearl. ‘By how much?’

  ‘Another quid a week.’

  She pursed her lips, her head cocked to one side as she thought it over. ‘Yeah, all right, I’ll stay.’

  ‘Good, now as I said, get back to your work.’

  No sooner had Madge left the kitchen than Dolly erupted. Her face red with anger, she banged a frying pan onto the cooker. ‘Madge knew she had me over a barrel – the cow! Another quid a week! I must be mad. Huh, she thinks she’s got one over me, but when we get another waitress, I might just give her the sack.’

  With the potato peeler poised, Pearl glanced at the clock. It was ten o’clock, but she doubted Kevin was up. Since Bernie’s comments, she too was beginning to doubt that he was looking for work. When he surfaced, Dolly would cook him a breakfast and he’d spend a leisurely hour eating it whilst reading the morning paper.

  They’d only been married for two weeks, but Pearl was disillusioned. As long as Dolly kept Kevin provided with money, he seemed happy to remain there, virtually ignoring his new wife as he went about his own business. She no longer mentioned work to him, finding it put him in a nasty mood, and now she felt that he had lied to her about wanting a place of their own. Oh God, please let me be wrong, she prayed, dreading living permanently with her mother-in-law.

  That evening Kevin cadged more money from his mother. She gave him a few quid, but not enough for a trip to Soho, and his frustration mounted. She was still keeping him short, and he couldn’t get relief from Pearl – their lack of privacy had seen to that.

  Pearl had stopped nagging him about a job at last, the silly cow unaware that he had plans in hand, ones he couldn’t tell her about. Ones that hopefully would provide enough for a place of their own. He was going to rob the pub in Richmond, and to that end had given the barmaid a ring, pleased to find it was her night off and she was available.

  Now he sat beside her, inwardly fuming. He’d spent the last of his money inundating her with booze, but it had been a complete waste of time. New at the job, Mary had little information about the workings of the place.

  At last he rose to his feet, snapping impatiently, ‘Come on, I’ll take you home.’

  She looked up at him, eyes bleary and un focused. ‘Home? I don’t want to go home yet.’

  ‘Tough,’ he said, grabbing her arm and heaving her up.

  Kevin’s jaw clenched, wishing now that he’d spent his money on a tart. How long had it been since he’d had a woman? Bloody ages. If he could get it up with Pearl it might have offered some release, but with his mother close by he found it impossible. Ashamed, he let Pearl think that she was to blame, turning his back on her every night.

  Kevin walked out of the pub, his temper only just in check. The pub was remote, the car park, other than his car, empty. To ensure that nobody saw them together, he had arranged to pick Mary up at the end of her street, but his caution had been for nothing. Now he had to waste more petrol money driving the useless cow home again.

  It was dark, woods surrounding them, but Kevin was uncaring of Mary as she swayed beside him. She tripped and he grabbed her arm, inadvertently touching her breast.

  She flapped her hand, saying with a silly giggle, ‘Oh, you dirty boy.’

  He stiffened. Dirty boy! Words his mother had used again and again when he was a child. He growled low in his throat, and in his angry and frustrated state, Mary’s comment set off a chain of action that overwhelmed Kevin.

  Mindless now, his grip tightened on her arm as he dragged her towards the surrounding trees. Mary staggered beside him, hardly aware of what he was doing as he pulled her deeper into the woods.

  Suddenly she halted. ‘Where are we going?’

  ‘Shut up, bitch!’ Kevin hissed, forcing her forward again.

  ‘Wh … what?’

  He ignored her as he looked wildly around. They were deep inside the woods now, fallen leaves crunching underfoot. It was perfect. There was hardly any light from the moon and, grinning with glee, Kevin threw Mary violently to the ground.

  She landed heavily, crying out, but Kevin threw himself on top of her, his hands tearing at her clothes.

  ‘No! No, don’t!’

  That was all Kevin needed, her cries like music to his ears. He smashed a fist into her face, and then began to tear at her clothes again, leering as she struggled beneath him.

  She still resisted, arousing him, his actions becoming frantic as his fists beat again and again into her soft flesh. She was a woman, fighting him, and he punished her, his teeth sinking into her flesh.

  At last she lay compliant and he loved it. He had won, she was helpless – his to control now as he forced her legs apart. He thrust inside her, groaning with pleasure, mindless as he sought the release he craved.

  When had she become so still? Kevin had no idea, only aware, when he was finished, of Mary’s motionless body beneath him. In the darkness he ran his hands over her, the breath leaving his body with relief when he felt her ribcage move. Christ, for a moment he thought he’d killed her.

  His relief was short-lived as panic set in. Bloody hell, he was still in trouble. He’d raped her, beaten her. Staggering to his feet, he rushed blindly through the trees, thinking only of self-preservation.

  Mary would go to the police, tell them she’d been raped, but what else could she tell them? Think, man! Think!

  She didn’t know his name; with the job in mind he’d been careful to give her a false one. Had he mentioned where he lived? No, of course he hadn’t. His mind raced with his feet. How many people had seen them together? There had only been a couple of customers in the pub, old men playing cribbage, but the landlord might remember him and give a description.

  Kevin’s thoughts were still raging as he broke free of the woods, relieved to find himself close to the small car park. His car! Bloody hell, could they trace him through his car? He rushed towards it, diving into the passenger seat, at the same time realising that without them knowing the number plates, it would be unlikely.

  He had to get away and quickly! Frantically gunning the engine to life, he roared out onto the narrow country road, sweat pouring down his face and almost blinding him as he screeched away around a corner.

  29

  Bessie locked the shop. She hadn’t seen Pearl for a few days and was missing the girl. Pearl had been married for a few months now, and though she hadn’t appeared happy at first, nowadays it seemed that everything in the garden was rosy.

  They were still living with Dolly and, despite Pearl’s protestations, Bessie thought Kevin was a lazy sod. He wasn’t well, Pearl insisted, suffering from nerves, but Bessie didn’t believe it. What did Kevin Dolby have to be nervous about? He’d been mollycoddled since childhood, spoiled rotten, and in her opinion it was just another excuse to avoid getting a job.

  Bessie went upstairs, the empty living room cheerless as she walked in. Pearl had lived with her for only a short time, but since she’d left it emphasised her loneliness. Still, she had a card reading to do, and maybe Pearl would pop over to see her later.

  She had barely made herself a cup of tea when the client arrived. Taking her into the living room, Bessie began to set the scene. She sat the woman opposite her at the table and then took out her cards, unwrapping them from a deep purple silk cloth. With a serious expression on her face she began to shuffle them, the cards old and worn after so much use. She then handed them to the client, the woma
n looking deeply worried as she took them. Bessie studied her, and judging by her age felt the consultation might be due to marital problems.

  When the cards were returned she laid them out, glancing at the woman as she said, ‘Ah, I see a dark-haired man, one you may have worries about.’

  ‘Yes, that’d be my husband,’ the woman replied eagerly, her back straightening in the chair.

  Bessie hid a smile. She had hit on the problem almost immediately, making this reading easy. ‘You care deeply for this man,’ she offered.

  ‘Yeah, I do,’ she said sadly.

  Bessie fished again, hoping she was right. ‘You’re suspicious about something, perhaps an affair?’

  The woman’s eyes filled with tears and, nodding, she sobbed, pulling a handkerchief out of her pocket. ‘Yes,’ she whispered.

  Bessie turned another card, surprised to feel a sudden flash of intuition. ‘You’re wrong, he isn’t having an affair.’

  ‘But … but he hasn’t been himself lately. Are you sure?’

  ‘Yes, I’m sure. I think it’s his health that’s worrying him, and maybe you should talk to him about it.’

  ‘Oh, no! It ain’t anything serious, is it?’

  ‘The cards aren’t clear, but I don’t think so.’ She placed a card across the last one, smiling softly. ‘I see a good marriage, a strong marriage, and if your husband hasn’t mentioned his concerns, it’s because he wants to protect you from worry.’

  ‘Oh God,’ the woman said, ‘and here I am thinking that just because he ain’t touched me lately, he’s having it off on the side.’ She rose swiftly to her feet. ‘Thanks, Bessie, but I don’t want to hear any more. I just want to go home and talk to him. I’ve been giving the poor sod a rough time, and now I know that he doesn’t deserve it I feel awful.’

  As the woman opened her purse, Bessie held up a palm. ‘No, love, it was only a short reading and there’s no need to pay.’

  ‘Thanks, it’s kind of you,’ the woman said.

  She hurried from the room and Bessie had a job to keep up with her as she ran downstairs. She let her out, calling goodbye and then, puffing, returned to the living room. With a sigh she picked up the cards, shuffling them as her mind moved. The flash of intuition had come in handy, making the reading an easy one, but she couldn’t help feeling a little concerned about the woman’s husband. She hoped his illness wasn’t serious, her intuition unclear about that, but at least now he would have his wife’s support.